Monday, August 18, 2008

Killer Bees

My friend told me I shouldn’t kill the yellow jackets that are keeping the hummingbirds away from my feeders because their numbers are down this year and we need the honey they make. I’m sorry but it’s out of my hands.

My logic is if they were making honey instead of raiding my hummingbird feeders, they wouldn’t have to die at the end of my fly swatter. Regardless of my vigilance and the bottles of apple vinegar and Mountain Dew I set out to keep them away from the hummingbird feeders, they prevailed throughout June and much of July.

Suddenly the yellow jackets were gone and hornets took their place. The yellow jackets allowed the hummingbirds to enjoy at least a little of the nectar, but the hornets were not so generous. Hornets are bigger and meaner and not interested in apple cider vinegar.

Now the hornets have been replaced by something that looks like yellow jackets with Roid Rage. These yellow and black striped bees are nearly as big as the hummingbirds with tempers to match their intimidating size. My fly swatter simply knocks the wind out of them and makes them angry. After I knock them to the ground I have to hunt them down and squash their guts out with my shoe. Fortunately for the survival of the species, I’m a terrible aim. At least they are slower then the hornets and easier targets than the yellow jackets, even for someone as clumsy as me. .

If someone knows the identity of these killer bees, I would love to know. The nights are getting colder, so they should be gone soon. I wonder what’s going to replace them. I hope the bees don’t get any bigger. If this were a Twilight Zone episode, they would fly into my house one night and carry me away to Bee Land where I was the one ducking fly swatters and living on hummingbird food.


I guess possible storylines can come from anywhere.

Happy Writing!

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